REMINDERS:

Belmont Stakes - Sat, Jun. 11 - 4 days

Flag Day - Tue, Jun 14 - 7 days

Father's Day - Sun, Jun 19 - 12 days

Summer Solstice - Tue, Jun 21 - 14 days

Independence Day - Mon, Jul 04 - 27 days
**********************

JOKES:
.......
A widowed lady, traveling alone, was taking a long plane trip back to where she & her husband both grew up.

Upon arriving at the airport she informed the airline that she wanted to take her dog with her in the cabin. She became angry when the airline told her she couldn't, but finally gave in and allowed them to put the dog in the baggage compartment.

The airline pilot told her, "It will be warm & pressurized in there, & your dog should be just fine. Nothing to worry about."

Upon arrival at the first fuel stop, the crew went to check on the dog and found it dead! The airline crew quickly ran all over town until they found a dog of the same color, height, weight, and sex & put it in the cage in place of the dead dog.

Upon arrival at their final destination, they hand delivered the lady her dog. Quite surprised, the woman says, "Sorry, but that's not my dog!
Could you please go get *my* dog?"

The airline pilot replies, "Sure it's your dog.
Look! It's the same height, weight, color, & sex as when we loaded it."

The lady again insisted, "THIS, IS *NOT* MY DOG!"

The airline pilot asks her, "Just how do you know that this isn't your dog?"

The widow answers. . . . "Because my dog was dead! I was taking it home to bury it next to my husband!"
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Two little girls from the neighborhood came by with a wagon load of rocks and asked if I'd like to buy one. They were so excited about earning their own money that I purchased a few. As they were leaving, I heard one say, "See, I told you.
People will buy anything."
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
A small, uncertain, and nervous witness was being cross-examined.

The lawyer thundered, "Have you ever been married?"

"Yes, sir," said the witness in a low voice.
"Once."

"Whom did you marry?" the lawyer demanded.

"Well, a woman," the witness answered timidly.

The lawyer said angrily, "Of course you married a woman. Did you ever hear of anyone marrying a man?"

And the witness said meekly, "My sister did."
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Just before their first long deployment two Navy buddies were talking about the stress of leaving their families. A senior officer, a veteran of many deployments, overheard the conversation and offered the following advice:

"You must be sensitive to your wives' emotional needs," he said. "Never, ever, whistle while you pack!"
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
A ten-year-old boy and his mother were waiting in a dentist's office; discussing possible treatments for his painful tooth.

Entering the room, the dentist asked, "Well, son, which one's the troublemaker?"

Without hesitation, the boy replied, "My brother!"
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
I heard about a little boy who was spending the night at his aunt's and complained that she had turned out the light. "What is the matter Tommy?" asked the aunt. "You sleep in the dark at home don't you?" "Yes Auntie," replied the boy, "but it is my own dark."
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
I was talking on the phone with my son, who was stationed in Hawaii with the Air Force. He was explaining how the troops were learning to scuba-dive. "We used the buddy system," he said, "and occasionally dived into shark-infested waters."

Listening on the extension, my daughter asked, "What do you do if you see a shark?"

My son said, "Swim faster than my buddy."
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Being "Over The Hill" is better than being under it.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
A gossip is one who talks to you about others; a bore is one who talks to you about himself; a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Going to Church makes you no more a Christian than sleeping in a garage makes you a car.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Teacher: Davey, you must learn to write more clearly. I can hardly read your handwriting!

Davey: Oh, sure, then you'll complain about my spelling!
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
A man who has been very sick is visiting his doctor to get the results of a battery of tests.

"What are my chances of recovering, Doc?" he asks.

"One hundred percent," the doctor assures him.

"That's a relief," the patient says. "But how can you be so sure?"

"Well," the doctor says, "statistics show that nine out of every 10 patients with your disease will die. Yours is the 10th case I've treated. The others have all died. So you are bound to get well."
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
The measure of success is not how much money you have in the bank, but rather how much money the bank will lend you.
************************************
That's the jokes for today.
Have a GOOD one!
Chuck ..... and the Computer
 

C. S. ROLLASON WHOLESALERS

Like to make money from your kitchen table?
Check out our helpful sites below.... we also supply
help for established home operated businesses...

http://www.homebucks.com
http://www.future-world.com/10246.htm

The Best-Kept Secrets Revealed!
http://hop.clickbank.net/hop.cgi?crollason/aboutcom

Need Labels??? Check out my label site at:
http://chuck.clickprint.com

95 %, The highest Network Payout in the history of MLM. $95 out of $100!
$50.00 fast start bonus on every sale you make, including the first one!
Check: it out at:
http://www.goupp.com/power95/ch795

"How To Create Automatic Money Machines On The Internet" - Full 7 Letter Series - Free!
Visit Our Site To Sign Up Now:

http://www.thewarriorgroup.com/cgi-bin/a.pl?warriors&4053

Check out my Daily Journal (here’s what I’m doing.)
http://www.homebucks.com/chucks/daily.html